Funny Pick Up Line Text Message Fails

In a world filled with dating apps, you are bound to receive messages filled with stupid pick-up lines. I've probably used a few myself, but we'll keep that our little secret.

40 Best Stupid Pick-up Lines

Ready or not, here are some of the more common stupid pick-up lines:

"You're so sweet; you're giving me a toothache."
"Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk past you again?"
"If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?"
"Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?"
"Did it hurt? When you fell out of heaven?"
"Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes."
"Is it hot in here, or is it just you?"
"Does heaven know they're missing an angel?"
"I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?"
"I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away!"
"Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile!"
"Remember me? Oh, that's right; I've only met you in my dreams."
"My friends bet I can't talk to the prettiest girl; want to use their money to buy drinks?"
"You must be tired; you have been running through my head all day."
"Do you like bananas? Because I find you a-peeling."
"Are you feeling okay? It looks like your lacking vitamin Me."
"Is your mother a beaver? Cuz dammmm!"
"Are you related to yoda? Cuz Yoda-Licious!"
"Is your name Jewel? Because you were meant for me."
"Did you sit in sugar? Because you have a sweet ass."
"Did you play soccer? Because you sure are a keeper."
"Did you play volleyball? Because I sure dig ya!"
"Did you play baseball/softball? Because I wanna take you home."
"Are you from Australia? Because I can see ya down under."
"Are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you."
"That's a great pair of jeans… they'd look even better on my bedroom floor."
"You must wash your jeans in Windex, because I can see myself in them."
"You must be from Tennessee, because you are the only 10 I see!"
"I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my wallet."
"Is your name WiFi? Because I'm really feeling a connection."
"If looks could kill, you'd be a weapon of mass destruction."
"Girl, if you were words on a page, you'd be fine print."
"Hi, do you have a few minutes for me to hit on you?"
"Like a broken pencil, life without you is pointless."
"Don't tell me if you want me to take you out to dinner. Just smile for yes, or do a backflip for no."
"If I had four quarters to give to the four prettiest girls in the world, you would have a dollar."
"You're so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line."
"Do you have a tan, or do you always look this hot?"
"You could spam me all night and I still wouldn't unsubscribe."
"What do you say we bounce like a bad email?"

This is not a shortlist, but it's only a very small sampling of stupid pick-up lines that are commonly used.

The Art of the Stupid Pick-up Line

For as long as there have been single people looking to meet someone there have been stupid pick-up lines. Pick-up lines have been used by mostly men for centuries, even without realizing it.

Stupid pick-up lines are the stuff of movies, TV shows, comedy routines, and books, but that doesn't mean people don't give them their college best.

Stupid pickup lines - do they work? — Do stupid pick-up lines work?

Sure, you've heard some pretty lame, terrible, and OMG-you're-embarrassing-yourself things from strangers before, but these pick-up lines might be the weirdest (but also hysterical) sentences to ever come from a person's mouth.

Stupid pick-up lines through the ages

1960's: Stupid pick-up lines

"Even The Beatles think that we should 'Come Together.' Right now."
"Mount THIS protest."

1970's: Stupid pick-up lines

"You're once, twice, three times a lady." – Lionel Richie
"I think there's something wrong with my eyes…I can't take them off of you."

1980's: Stupid pick-up lines

"If I told you that you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"
"You are fine as wine."

1990's: Stupid pick-up lines

"How you doin'?" Used in the iconic television show Friends.
And there was a plethora of lines from, Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery, "Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later?"

Early 2000's: Stupid pick-up lines

"Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for."
"Your husband had told me you were the most beautiful woman that he'd ever met. I didn't expect the most beautiful woman I'd ever met."

Stupid pick-up lines have been used throughout the ages, and we continue to use them today.

Stupid pick-up lines for online dating

How do you start the conversation with someone, either online or in-person? How do you break the ice? Do you scour the internet or watch romantic comedy movies and take notes?

Online dating apps have replaced face-to-face first encounters for many singles, but that doesn't mean the stupid pick-up lines have gone to the wayside.

In reality, you never know what's going to happen on a dating app. More than likely you'll have crappy conversations until one person stops responding, but that doesn't stop us from trying.

Online Dating Scenario

Let's picture this everyday situation. Perhaps you're using a dating app, anyone of your choosing, and bam, you have a match. Now what? Do you start obsessing over how to start the conversation?

Most respondents are looking for more than a simple "hello". They want something to entice them, make them curious, or to find something intriguing about their new match.

If you're new to the online dating community and curious where your bad pickup lines may fit in, let me share a few pointers.

The shortlist below includes a few simple ways to get started with online dating and have the chance to use that stupid pickup line.

1. Men have to make the move (generally)

Men need to make the first move (generally)

In all honesty, it's usually up to the guy to make the first move. While some men have natural ease at talking to women, others freeze, their heart starts to pound and they don't know what to say to catch your interest. They start thinking, "Should I ask her a question?" "Do I compliment her?" "Should I just say hello?"

Unfortunately, this type of guy might end up spending hours thinking about what to say and the delivery of his message. And then he turns to a stupid pick-up line in hopes to get a laugh.

2. Be confident

Will your match think you've just given a great opener, while simultaneously being left with a sour taste because of your stupid pick-up line?

Some men think that pick-up lines are harmless fun and women should just have a sense of humor. Other men say they do it because they want to get a reaction out of the woman. It doesn't matter if the reaction is good or bad, just as long as she notices them.

Know this: when men approach women with stupid pick-lines, they are silently thinking, "I know I have no shot at you, but I am not letting you pass over without saying something."

There is no right answer, sometimes they work, and sometimes they don't. The question is; do you want to take that risk?

Do women like stupid pick-up lines?

Most women can smell a traditional pick-up line from a mile away.

The thing about pick-up lines is they are typically canned and boring. Stupid pick-up lines are used over and over and most women say they have heard them all, and women consistently say they hate them.

In addition, women say they are constantly inundated with messages from guys who think they're being clever, when in fact; they're just coming off as creepy.

Most of the time when a woman is being approached by a man, they are already highly guarded; know the pick-up lines are coming and have their defenses ready.

Do women use stupid pick-up lines?

Although this article highlights that men are the majority who use stupid pick-up lines, there is a fair share of women who admit to using them too; even though they admit to hating when they are approached by a guy using the same method to start a conversation.

Women are mostly trying to figure out if a guy would play along; would he exchange in the banter, or walk away from a woman making the first move.

Stupid pickup lines used by women

Here are 10 stupid pick-up lines that women may occasionally use:

"If you can name all of the members of the Backstreet Boys, I'll go home with you."
"Have you ever read Dr. Seuss? Because green eggs and DAMN!"
"You're cute. I like you. Text me." (Left on a bill at a restaurant)
"Do I know you from somewhere?"
"OMG, I'm sorry, I thought you were someone I went to school with."
"I love your shirt. It really brings out your eyes."
"How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice."
"Your body is about 65 percent water and I'm thirsty."
"I love this shirt! Did your girlfriend buy it for you?"
"Truth or dare?"

Do stupid pick-up lines ever work?

Are you asking yourself if a stupid pick-up line will get you a phone number or a date? The answer is, probably not.

The trick with using a stupid pick-up line is to not use it. We've already heard it.

However, if we give everyone an equal playing field, there is a slight chance if your pick-up line is delivered perfectly, at the exact right moment, and your stupid pick-up line happens to be spectacular, you might get a smile at minimum, and it's up to you to take it from there, but be prepared to work for more than that.

Be realistic

Keep in mind that even if your stupid pick-up line is amazing and delivered with a comedian's touch, they still might fail.

The key takeaway is to know that women like to feel special, so if you're going to use a stupid pick-up line you have to put in the extra effort to be engaging and creative.

There is a reason that there are professional pick-up artists out there — because sometimes they work.

The good ones have a slight chance of getting the conversation going and can be the deal maker for a date and the catalyst for a relationship that goes the distance.

But the bad ones are, inappropriately crass, desperate, and cross sexual lines that show to the girl you are just hoping for sex.

Stupid pick-up lines just for fun

There are those people who might think dating is not to be taken too seriously or are out to have a good time. In this case, a stupid pick-up line can help remind you that meeting fun people should be fun.

In this case, your stupid pick-up line could come in handy.

In short, with more situations than ever to figure out how to flirt with a girl, sometimes a well-timed, ironic or hilarious pick-up line can be just the thing to get a conversation started.

Even if you never use them out in the field, knowing some stupid pick-up lines could make for a few good laughs.

Stupid pickup lines today

The world we live in has changed; it has evolved into a time where people have become more conscious of the prevalence of sexual harassment and abuse.

Are stupid pick-up lines; the time-honored statements that are used to break the ice, still acceptable in the era of the "Me, too" movement?

Are they a form of harassment or are they still seen as an acceptable part of the dating ritual?

Usually, when people think of pick-up lines they look to another person's appearance for inspiration. This is what leads to a lot of the stupid pick-up lines that people are used to hearing and that often come across as offensive.

The research

In an article published in The Reminder, their staff turned to the internet and asked that question to the members of several groups on Facebook, as well as set up a poll.

The results to the question, "How do you feel about pick-up lines?" were as follows:

Forty-eight people said, "They don't work."
Twenty-nine people said, "It depends on the line and the guy." Further explanation: women agreed that the line can be considered funny or acceptable if the guy is not creepy or pushy. If it is an aggressive pick up line, or one that is sexually charged, the general consensus was that those are unacceptable.
Thirty-three people said, "They're funny."
Nine people said, "They're annoying."
One person said, "They're creepy."
One person said, "They're offensive."

So why have pickup lines survived?

Introducing yourself to someone new is always scary—the possibility of rejection is part of the deal—but if you use a pick-up line that's just cheesy or silly enough, you might make them laugh, and that's at least a step in the right direction.

The science behind pick-up lines

Stupid pick-up lines are more than the knock-knock jokes of dating.

And as much as stupid pick-up lines make us cringe, the interesting thing about pick-up lines is people make fun of stupid pick-up lines while continuing to use the allegedly good ones.

Psychology Today posted an article titled, "The Science of Pick-Up Lines". The article states that pick-up lines were first scientifically evaluated by Bale, Morrison, and Caryl (2006) and further explored by Cooper and associates (Cooper, O'Donnell, Caryl, Morrison, & Bale, 2007).

The results

The initial results supported that, "pick-up lines that showed off some aspect of a man's positive attributes or value as a mate was seen as most effective.

These lines were especially appealing to women who were self-conscious, shy, or anxious, and looking for a friendly and considerate man. In contrast, women who were more outgoing and energetic preferred humorous and direct lines from men, as they desired leadership characteristics in a mate.

Personality Differences

Finally, women whose personality tests revealed them to be aggressive, impulsive, or risk-takers tended to like a "bad boy" type—and they preferred lines featuring generic compliments as well as overtly sexual lines."

In addition, they concluded that "pick-up lines serve as an advertisement, filter, and screening device. The type of line a man chooses says something about his personality and attributes.

Similarly, whether a woman finds a particular type of line appealing says something about her personality and attributes as well."

Final thoughts

In summary, it's fair to say that although stupid pick-up lines have been around for quite a long time; most people usually get a good laugh from hearing a stupid pick-up line, get offended, hate them, but somehow still use them.

There is no rhyme or reason to know if they will work, but both sexes still try using them.

What we know is that even if a stupid pick-up line works, it's only a temporary spark that needs to be fueled, so if you can't follow up on your one-liner, you won't get very far.

And don't be fooled, when you attract a woman (or man) using a stupid pick-up line what you find is that the girl isn't actually attracted to you, she's attracted to your script.

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Source: https://www.meetopolis.com/stupid-pickup-lines